Every year, I try to write a letter to Lee, this year, I am writing to Livy too. If you want to read the previous ones, here are the links 1, 2, 3.

The King is 4 and the Queen is 1.5. I can’t believe it’s been this long. The memories are still fresh, and it all feels like everything happened just yesterday.

Lee, I remember that Sunday morning when your mum went into labour, I still remember rushing to gather the box with the hospital content. Everything happened so fast. I had prayed it happened on a weekend. I honestly didn’t want to imagine what it will feel like driving a woman in labour through Lagos’s traffic.

Livy, you, on the other hand, your arrival was well planned. The doctors gave us a date and we practically “checked into” the hospital. Yours was a smooth one. I remember our(your brother and I) drive home that night after I had dropped off your mum at the hospital. I was stopped by the police, but thankfully, they let me go. I guess because they saw your brother at the backseat. We both got home and I could barely sleep that night. We rushed off the following the day at 6AM, but unfortunately, missed when the Doctors wheeled your mum into the theatre. Nonetheless, I was super excited when I saw you. It was love at first sight. You’re an amazing young woman, you’re a blessing.

Lee and Livy, being your parent is the single most important achievement of mine. Way more important than any other thing; academic, career, etc. I love the responsibility that comes with it. It’s a blessing.

You kids may not understand this, but having you in my life has made me a better man, I am more patient, more tolerant, more observant, I catch myself weighing all my options before making a decision these days and my reflexes have gone up 300%. More than you helping me become a better man, I am working hard on myself to become a better man too. It’s a journey and I don’t think there’s a destination to this particular journey, but I am excited about this. The one thing I owe you both more than anything is a good name.

Being your parent this past 5.5yrs cumulatively has been humbling. I now have renewed respect for your grandparents. How they managed/raised me and your uncles and aunts is still a feat in itself. Kudos to them.

The Last One Year

So, let me tell you both what the last year has been like. It’s been both beautiful and stressful, we got the opportunity of seeing the whole family; grandparents, uncles, aunts, cousins, the whole nine yards(man, you both come from a really large family).

Lee, you made it into a new class(reception), you lost your first class teacher, this wasn’t an easy one for all of us. She was an all-round good woman. Thank you, Mrs Ishua. God bless her soul and continue to strengthen her family.

Your speech is becoming a lot clearer, I particularly enjoy all the after school stories you tell me every single day; from who fell on the playground to what you ate and who you are building a strong bond with. I love the fact you’re building these bonds and making memories as you go. Most importantly, I love that you’re building your circle(tribe.)

Your handwriting is 100 times better than it was last year. You’re writing legibly now. You’re learning to spell pretty well too. And I can’t wait to get your emails. Lord knows I will print the first one and frame it. I honestly can’t wait. You can now ride your bicycle pretty well too. I’m still worried about taking off your training wheels, but let’s see, I will take them off this Christmas. And you love your scooter too. Man, it’s always beautiful watching you glide effortlessly on that two-wheelers. You get lost in the process momentarily and for a split second, it feels as though you’re in a different world. Man, the smile on your face when that happens always fills my heart. It’s worth its weight in gold.

Livy, you are now a big girl, breastmilk is out of the way now. But what’s more surprising is the fact that you weaned yourself with almost no help from anyone. By your 10th month, you were already walking. And today, your gait is so strong now I almost don’t have to worry about you stumbling. You’re always a delight to be with. Your smile, your laughter always fills my heart. On a few occasion, I must have teared up. And you’re growing up into a fine young lady. I am super proud of you and all your future accomplishment. I can’t wait to scream from the crowd when you’re giving your valedictory speech. I have a feeling I will be chased out of that crowd. Well, don’t blame the “African dad” in me.

2020

Lee & Livy, this has been an interesting year. One that I think the world hasn’t seen in a long while and one that we were not prepared for. It started like every other year and by March this year, things quickly went downhill. The world hasn’t recovered yet and I think it will take a while before it does. But one thing is certain, life, as we knew it will never be the same again. Ever. Depending on how you look at it, this might be a good or a bad thing. But through it all, we are grateful for God’s faithfulness.

This year has been challenging for us all, for me, it’s stretched me and pretty much uncovered a part of me I never knew existed. I have been stretched professionally, physically, tested my relationship with a couple of people, and yes, health-wise, it has stretched me too. There have been nights I went to bed and couldn’t close my eyes for 10min. For the nights that I could sleep well, I have been woken up to a not so nice dream more than once, covered in sweat, even though the room was pretty cold. Someday, I will sit you two down and we will talk about 2020.

This year too, I became intentional about my health after the Doctors told me I needed to make some personal adjustment. I have started walking and running as a form of exercising. I try to do about 5,000 steps daily, but my personal best so far is about 20,000 steps. I still have the blister scar.

The Road Ahead.

Lee, 4 is a big milestone and Livy, 1.5 is a big one too, you both are getting to know a lot about yourselves. Your traits are beginning to show forth. I can already see your personalities too. You both will do great things.

Finally, I will love to leave you both with these few life lessons, there are not different from what I said to you(Lee) last year;

Work hard. There is no substitute for this. While there is such a thing as luck, but the harder you work, the luckier you will get. Put in the work.

God. Keep God at the centre of all you do. It’s impossible to go through life without God.

Relationship. This is one of life’s best gifts to us. Keep and maintain a healthy relationship with people. And when you get into one, don’t abuse it. Don’t take undue advantage of it. Seek to contribute more than you take. Don’t become a parasite.

Fairness and Equity. Treat people first as humans, irrespective of their social standing. Be fair and just in all your dealings. Do unto them, what you will like to be done to you. I can’t stress this enough, respect everyone.

Mistakes. There will always be mistakes. You will make them, consciously and unconsciously. But when you make them, learn from the experience and move on. Don’t dwell too much on it. Never accept a pity party. NEVER.

Peer pressure. We will do our best to show you the right way, don’t deviate from it. Don’t let anyone make you do what you know doesn’t align with your values as a person. Be your own man.

Finances. Keep an eye on your finances. Always SAVE. You will always need it.

Emotions. Watch your temperament. I haven’t done much of a great job here myself, but thanks to your mum, I am learning a lot from her. When you get angry, watch what you say. Never let anger get the best of you. There are always consequences when you can’t put your emotions in check.

Passion. Follow your passion, this will be your one true source of happiness.

These last 5.5 years has been super amazing, I feel incredibly honoured to be called your father, you both make fatherhood fun and thank you for being amazing kids. I love you.

Happy birthday, King and Queen. Love, Dad.

I'll love to hear from you

Do you want to say hello? Email me - celestineomin@gmail.com

I tweet at @cyberomin